Most gifted neurodivergents are late bloomers, and I have a theory as to why.
Blooming, like all growth, occurs on a spectrum. Those who absorb the most inputs take longer to peak and blossom because they must process, catalog, and form patterns from all the extra information.
Those who fit into the system fall close to normal. Following societal paths, they bloom as expected in their 20s and 30s. Outliers represent the extremes. Some bloom very early—prodigies processing and learning in specific areas that far exceed their peers. They stand out but too often fade in early adulthood. On the opposite side of this spectrum are the outliers who bloom very late. These, I believe, are the big-picture gifted neurodivergents.
While our systems acknowledge both prodigies and midlife geniuses, they support neither. I have learned from my own children that prodigies are created, not made. I have developed prodigies by first and foremost reducing the pressure the systems put on them. I let my big-picture gifted neurodivergent children grow organically. I keep them from the limelight and competition, which only helps them grow. Yet each time they go into the system, they lose touch with their prodigious gifts because the effort to be normal is so great.
I can't help but feel and see that our systems are set up to destroy our potential and natural way of being. I believe the entire system crushes neurodivergent giftedness to replace it with its version of expertise and reality.
It is so effective at this effort that most late-blooming gifted neurodivergents never reach midlife or their full potential. There are many examples from history that support my perspective. Additionally, many neurodivergent youths and young adults take their own lives or have their lives taken by others simply because they struggle with or are targeted for their societal nonconformity. Too few gifted neurodivergents make it to middle age; too many succumb to addiction, mental, or physical illness. Sensitivity is hard on the brain and body, compounded by an increasingly hostile and polluted world.
While the saying "what does not kill you makes you stronger" is true, I believe there is an outsized cost specifically for those of us with gifted neurodivergence. If you are one of the few who endures—who makes it through or around addiction, illness, being a target of extreme oppression, little to no development, and all the other challenges—you find yourself waxing just as the rest of the population wanes.
If you make it that far and remain whole, you will find that not fitting in and being forced out of the system to create your place is the ultimate gift. The journey you must go on to build your own place makes you intimately acquainted with yourself, and the space you build fits perfectly because you made it.
If you reach your peak, you will quickly realize you are extraordinarily rare. There are few of us out there, and at this moment in history, we are more crucial than ever. You can offer unique insights to everyone facing a world that requires us all to create a unique path. You are everything good humanity offers as a representative of the future.
You are so rare because we are exiting an era where most did not struggle. They followed the paths they were given, and success was nearly guaranteed. Those days are over. Our systems do not serve the majority of the people. The future seems scary because it is. You are one of the few rare individuals who have run the gauntlet of life and can now help others do the same.
In the past, people like us retreated to the woods seeking solitude from the insanity, death, and destruction of humanity. But our woods are now gone. They have cut them down and left no place to go. There is a reason for this. We are the stopgap for humanity. Your suffering had a purpose, and the brilliance born from it will determine whether humanity thrives or perishes.
In this place, I am asking those like me to join me and figure out how we use our uniqueness to help each other and others like us. I would like to share with you, and you only, how my genius works, how I navigated the worst parts of humanity and survived, how it changed the way I think and feel, and likely turned on instincts the vast majority have lost, resulting in instincts, intuition, and cognition that are not recognized in our systems and barely covered in history but are real nonetheless.
I ask that you share how you work and the experiences that cultivated you to be all you are today. In these stories are the lessons and gifts we need to save and cultivate the younger versions of us to change the world for the better.
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